babswants2
03-02-2009, 10:05 AM
Whenever my friends, or anyone really, and I enter discussions relating to sexual attitudes, I generally say that I am a sexually less than inhibited liberal. Sounds good to me anyway. I will explain what I mean in that I really frame my sexual self around enjoying the freedom to choose what I do and don’t want to do without anxiety that I might offend someone in my playful choosing. I really do not think I am now or ever was promiscuous though, there are probably many that say I was. But for the most part it has never bothered me what others think.
My attitude toward how I framed my sexual preferences and enjoyments were only partially shaped through experiences of curiosity leading to trial and error as the hormones began to flow at a young age. I lost my virginity in the back seat of a car to a boy whose face I really can’t remember. I think it might have been fun, that I can’t really remember either. I do know that my peers were all into who was doing what with whom, so I made breaking my hymen sound as if it were the most wonderful thing in the world immediately after it happened. My curiosity was strong though, perhaps indication of my interest in voyeurism and exhibitionism today. Back then in the beginning, sexual show and tell was more fun than was the actual physical involvement.
Then I met Steve. Shamefully, I admit I was engaged to be married at the time. However, I’m pretty sure had it not been for Steve, I could have entered into a relationship that was bound for failure. It was a pretty stupid thing really to be thinking about marriage then, both my fiancé at the time and I were only a sophomores in college. He was a star athlete head strong into himself and I had my own aspirations to achieve great things in the business world. We were probably more a convenience to each other than really in love. It seemed that many of my friends were thinking about house, kids, and being taken care of by a loving husband. I sort of fell into that trap too.
Anyway, back to Steve. He was a friend of a guy who I had actually watched take his clothes off at a bachelorette party. I wrote about that event in another entry in this website. I was out doing the Friday night happy hour thing (in Kansas back then, beer and the bars were available to the over 18 college crowd), which in the wintertime in the Midwest, was where we all headed to amuse ourselves and stay warm. Gabe, the stripper guy, was with his girlfriend who had hosted the bachelorette party earlier in the year, and Steve was with them. My fiancé was with the basketball team, out of town getting ready for a weekend basketball game, and I was just looking for a night away from books and the dormitory. Gabe saw me first and asked if I wanted to hang with them for a while, which I didn’t mind since I had become literally familiar with him just a few months before. His girlfriend was the sister of my friend, who got married, and was pretty liberal when it came to her boyfriend and their relationship with each other. She gave me a hug then introduced me to Steve.
You know how it is when you make eye contact with someone and get that feeling that there is a link of some kind. That was how it happened with Steve. He had a warm and generally happy to meet you smile rather than the typical preppy, I would like to jump your bones” lustful stare. His eyes were dark, alluring and just melted me from that first eye connection. He was older, ummm, turned out 13 years older so it seemed a little strange for him to be out drinking in a college hang out. I learned he was doing grad school at a University a few miles away, had graduated from high school in the town where I was going to school, and was home visiting parents for the weekend. He and Gabe’s sister had actually been married but mutually divorced for a few years. They had a very convenient relationship of which I will touch on later. When I noted Steve wasn’t wearing a ring, I was a little uncomfortable in having on my engagement ring, especially the more I came to like him as the evening rolled along.
It wasn’t to far into the evening that Gabe and his girlfriend left to go home and I was pleased when Steve chose to hang around. It was a little unnerving because I knew some people in that particular bar who knew my fiancé and knew our commitment. Steve was not coming on to me by any measure; he really had just a very cool hand Luke demeanor about himself. He just leaned against a corner of the bar and watched the crowd while we chatted. When I asked him if he wanted to find a table, it was he who suggested we not give the opinion that we were being too friendly, since I was wearing a diamond. He’d noticed and I was impressed. Later when I really knew I liked this guy’s maturity, I began to ponder in my mind what I was doing allowing myself to get into the fix of a fixed relationship. That’s about the time when Steve said he needed to go but thought about stopping at a local diner for a cup of coffee and wondered if I would be interested. I knew the diner and knew a lot of the campus jocks who were friends with my boyfriend, frequented the place. When I explained why it wasn’t a good idea, he offered his parent’s home, which I thought, sounded innocent enough. After all, can you really get into trouble when someone’s parents are home, though I wondered why someone 30+ would invite a 19 year old to his parent’s home late into the evening? Nonetheless, I followed him to his parents in my car again feeling a mixture of guilt for doing this but the emotional high of meeting someone that really has piqued your interest. I won’t say he was turning me on (quite yet), but I for sure wanted to pursue this.
It was cool actually; his parents were up watching late night talk show. He introduced me, fixed coffee, and we sat and watched with his parents and chatted about school, much of what I can’t remember, but they were very nice and down to earth people. I was still wearing my engagement ring, and I am pretty sure his mom at least noticed but she never inquired. When mom and dad announced having to go to bed, I made it my excuse to get back to the dorm. The dorm curfew was 1 am and it was getting within the witching hour. Steve walked me to my car and thanked me for spending time with him. That’s when I surprised myself and told him I would like to see him again if he was interested. His response was that I should really get to know a little about him, but that he would call when he was in town. I then shared with him about my concerns about my own relationship and my developing second thoughts of marriage. Then my second surprise happened. Steve simply said, “get in your car, remove your panties, get back out of the car and hand them to me”. Twenty-six years later in life you remember some of what was said that impacted you, those words will stay with me as if they were said again just now. I was dumbfounded and certainly shocked. Steve then said, this was his parents home, it was cold outside and you are having trouble trying to decide if you want to be married before college graduation or not. He again repeated something to the affect of, “get in the car, take off your panties, get out of the car and hand them to me. And if you can do that then you really should think about your seriousness in getting married. If you can’t then we probably shouldn’t be thinking about calling when I’m in town and you probably can make a marriage work, at least for now”.
Perhaps more from the feelings that I really needed to tell my fiancé that we were too young to be thinking about marriage, but some of I had this strange turned on need to do what I had been instructed to do, I did it. Seemed like it took forever, but I fumbled through taking off my panties, including dropping my car keys on the floorboard. I remember giggling with a tinge of embarrassment when my rear was turned and exposed to the window while I was feeling around on the floor for the keys. I also remember being mortified because I was wearing white cottons. No one was wearing white cotton undies anymore. At least there was some lace pattern along the waistband. But the one thing that impressed me the most, Steve never went beyond the handing over of my panties that night. Most guys would have been all over getting to second base, then rounding third for a run-scoring attempt. He simply handed them back to me and told me to go to bed and think about what I just did. He then kissed me goodnight and opened the car door for me. It was that kiss that I spent most of the night thinking about; the panty scenario was only an after thought.
I have many tales to tell about how an older man educated me in the ways of uninhibited and highly erotic play. That simple taking a quick calculated chance of nervously removing an intimate piece of clothing and handing them over to a person whom I really didn’t know completely changed the direction of my life. Up to then, Sex to me was wham bam and not so exciting; however, that approach was about to change.
Thank you for reading, you would have needed to be patient to get through this but it offers a bit about Babs and her re-education of sexual pleasure. I look forward to telling more of my adventures in life.
My attitude toward how I framed my sexual preferences and enjoyments were only partially shaped through experiences of curiosity leading to trial and error as the hormones began to flow at a young age. I lost my virginity in the back seat of a car to a boy whose face I really can’t remember. I think it might have been fun, that I can’t really remember either. I do know that my peers were all into who was doing what with whom, so I made breaking my hymen sound as if it were the most wonderful thing in the world immediately after it happened. My curiosity was strong though, perhaps indication of my interest in voyeurism and exhibitionism today. Back then in the beginning, sexual show and tell was more fun than was the actual physical involvement.
Then I met Steve. Shamefully, I admit I was engaged to be married at the time. However, I’m pretty sure had it not been for Steve, I could have entered into a relationship that was bound for failure. It was a pretty stupid thing really to be thinking about marriage then, both my fiancé at the time and I were only a sophomores in college. He was a star athlete head strong into himself and I had my own aspirations to achieve great things in the business world. We were probably more a convenience to each other than really in love. It seemed that many of my friends were thinking about house, kids, and being taken care of by a loving husband. I sort of fell into that trap too.
Anyway, back to Steve. He was a friend of a guy who I had actually watched take his clothes off at a bachelorette party. I wrote about that event in another entry in this website. I was out doing the Friday night happy hour thing (in Kansas back then, beer and the bars were available to the over 18 college crowd), which in the wintertime in the Midwest, was where we all headed to amuse ourselves and stay warm. Gabe, the stripper guy, was with his girlfriend who had hosted the bachelorette party earlier in the year, and Steve was with them. My fiancé was with the basketball team, out of town getting ready for a weekend basketball game, and I was just looking for a night away from books and the dormitory. Gabe saw me first and asked if I wanted to hang with them for a while, which I didn’t mind since I had become literally familiar with him just a few months before. His girlfriend was the sister of my friend, who got married, and was pretty liberal when it came to her boyfriend and their relationship with each other. She gave me a hug then introduced me to Steve.
You know how it is when you make eye contact with someone and get that feeling that there is a link of some kind. That was how it happened with Steve. He had a warm and generally happy to meet you smile rather than the typical preppy, I would like to jump your bones” lustful stare. His eyes were dark, alluring and just melted me from that first eye connection. He was older, ummm, turned out 13 years older so it seemed a little strange for him to be out drinking in a college hang out. I learned he was doing grad school at a University a few miles away, had graduated from high school in the town where I was going to school, and was home visiting parents for the weekend. He and Gabe’s sister had actually been married but mutually divorced for a few years. They had a very convenient relationship of which I will touch on later. When I noted Steve wasn’t wearing a ring, I was a little uncomfortable in having on my engagement ring, especially the more I came to like him as the evening rolled along.
It wasn’t to far into the evening that Gabe and his girlfriend left to go home and I was pleased when Steve chose to hang around. It was a little unnerving because I knew some people in that particular bar who knew my fiancé and knew our commitment. Steve was not coming on to me by any measure; he really had just a very cool hand Luke demeanor about himself. He just leaned against a corner of the bar and watched the crowd while we chatted. When I asked him if he wanted to find a table, it was he who suggested we not give the opinion that we were being too friendly, since I was wearing a diamond. He’d noticed and I was impressed. Later when I really knew I liked this guy’s maturity, I began to ponder in my mind what I was doing allowing myself to get into the fix of a fixed relationship. That’s about the time when Steve said he needed to go but thought about stopping at a local diner for a cup of coffee and wondered if I would be interested. I knew the diner and knew a lot of the campus jocks who were friends with my boyfriend, frequented the place. When I explained why it wasn’t a good idea, he offered his parent’s home, which I thought, sounded innocent enough. After all, can you really get into trouble when someone’s parents are home, though I wondered why someone 30+ would invite a 19 year old to his parent’s home late into the evening? Nonetheless, I followed him to his parents in my car again feeling a mixture of guilt for doing this but the emotional high of meeting someone that really has piqued your interest. I won’t say he was turning me on (quite yet), but I for sure wanted to pursue this.
It was cool actually; his parents were up watching late night talk show. He introduced me, fixed coffee, and we sat and watched with his parents and chatted about school, much of what I can’t remember, but they were very nice and down to earth people. I was still wearing my engagement ring, and I am pretty sure his mom at least noticed but she never inquired. When mom and dad announced having to go to bed, I made it my excuse to get back to the dorm. The dorm curfew was 1 am and it was getting within the witching hour. Steve walked me to my car and thanked me for spending time with him. That’s when I surprised myself and told him I would like to see him again if he was interested. His response was that I should really get to know a little about him, but that he would call when he was in town. I then shared with him about my concerns about my own relationship and my developing second thoughts of marriage. Then my second surprise happened. Steve simply said, “get in your car, remove your panties, get back out of the car and hand them to me”. Twenty-six years later in life you remember some of what was said that impacted you, those words will stay with me as if they were said again just now. I was dumbfounded and certainly shocked. Steve then said, this was his parents home, it was cold outside and you are having trouble trying to decide if you want to be married before college graduation or not. He again repeated something to the affect of, “get in the car, take off your panties, get out of the car and hand them to me. And if you can do that then you really should think about your seriousness in getting married. If you can’t then we probably shouldn’t be thinking about calling when I’m in town and you probably can make a marriage work, at least for now”.
Perhaps more from the feelings that I really needed to tell my fiancé that we were too young to be thinking about marriage, but some of I had this strange turned on need to do what I had been instructed to do, I did it. Seemed like it took forever, but I fumbled through taking off my panties, including dropping my car keys on the floorboard. I remember giggling with a tinge of embarrassment when my rear was turned and exposed to the window while I was feeling around on the floor for the keys. I also remember being mortified because I was wearing white cottons. No one was wearing white cotton undies anymore. At least there was some lace pattern along the waistband. But the one thing that impressed me the most, Steve never went beyond the handing over of my panties that night. Most guys would have been all over getting to second base, then rounding third for a run-scoring attempt. He simply handed them back to me and told me to go to bed and think about what I just did. He then kissed me goodnight and opened the car door for me. It was that kiss that I spent most of the night thinking about; the panty scenario was only an after thought.
I have many tales to tell about how an older man educated me in the ways of uninhibited and highly erotic play. That simple taking a quick calculated chance of nervously removing an intimate piece of clothing and handing them over to a person whom I really didn’t know completely changed the direction of my life. Up to then, Sex to me was wham bam and not so exciting; however, that approach was about to change.
Thank you for reading, you would have needed to be patient to get through this but it offers a bit about Babs and her re-education of sexual pleasure. I look forward to telling more of my adventures in life.